Don’t Marry a “Project”

May 15, 2013 — 1 Comment

It’s really a pretty simple question.  Is the man you’re dating/living with the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?  It’s become one of the frequent questions I use when trying to assess a client’s problems.  How women answer the question reveals very important information. 

  • If there is hesitation in replying, then it’s obvious they have some serious reservations about the relationship.
  • If the answer begins with, “Yes, if…”, it indicates there are changes they want to take place before he’ll be “Mr. Right.”
  • If the answer begins with, “Yes, but…”, it shows they have one foot in the boat and the other foot on the dock, trying to decide whether to jump in or bail out.
  • If the answer is a quick, “No”, the followup question will be, “Then why are you with them?”

The problem occurring in these situations is that the women have paired themselves with a project.  Women are much more prone to be with a man that needs changing/reforming/saving than men being with women with similar issues.  There are a myriad reasons why this is true, but that is not the focus of this article.

My desire is to hold up a mirror and let women see themselves and their relationships so they can determine if it is where they really need to be.  Construction zones are dangerous places where people get hurt, even killed.

People don’t go to a junk yard to pick out their next vehicle.  They go to a car lot to find used vehicles that have been cleaned, polished, and repaired or to a showroom to buy a brand new car with all kinds of warranties in place. 

But there are many women who can’t resist the lure of a “fixer upper” when it comes to choosing a man.  Oftentimes the road behind these women is strewn with abandoned vehicles, because the cost of fixing them up almost sucked the life out of them.

If you don’t like the man you are with, just as he is today, then you need to seriously think about ditching that model.  Look for a man who already has all the traits you are looking for.

Seriously, which one would you rather have?

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One response to Don’t Marry a “Project”

  1. 
    proportionsinlife May 17, 2013 at 7:40 am

    Thank you! Thank you! for stopping by and commenting on my post. I’m glad to have read this one, and will surely read others! You are absolutely right (although some women like myself don’t care much for cars 🙂 ) but yes – keep away from the one that will have you stuck in a pothole for a long time with a crick in your neck!

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